What a weird night. Next door, Martin Lawrence was doing a comedy show. Whenever there’s a comedy show next door things get a little crazy. Not usually paint your face and bedazzle it crazy, but crazy none the less.
This kid showed up with his strange hand bag and his Ziggy Stardust face paint wanting to know where the stage door was. We didn’t ask why, but he told us anyway. He wanted to meet Martin Lawrence. He was probably one of the most effeminate people I’d ever talked to, and when we asked him if he was a fan, he told us that Martin was his favorite, and that he was in love with him and wanted to tell him that.
I think we all took a confused mental “Okaaaaaayyyy” moment before ushering him off to the stage doors. He sat down there hours before the show was set to begin, and told everyone he could how much he was in love with Martin Lawrence.
The security guards were getting annoyed by him. I think they also wanted to put the kibosh on what would have been a pretty awkward encounter, so they kicked him out. Told him if he came back he’d get arrested for trespassing. He went off on a tirade, and stormed over toward us and vented about what assholes they were.
In my mind I kind of pictured Martin being pretty homophobic. I didn’t imagine the response he might have gotten from the comedian would have been what he wanted. I wouldn’t have been surprised if he was called “faggot” and ridiculed. I wouldn’t put it past Martin or his hangers-on.
Eventually Ziggy disappeared, and I shit you not, within ten minutes of his disappearance, Martin was dropped off by his driver, rolling five deep with his crew.
Even though Martin is able to play off homosexuality for a joke:
I don’t think he would have been very kind to this strange kid.