Can I Get a Dollar For a Blowjob?

“Hey man, do me a solid, do me a mercy, give me a dollar.”

“I don’t have any money.”

“That’s bullshit man.  Do me a mercy, I need a dollar so I can get a blowjob from that chick across the street.”

I look over.  She looks hideous and broken down, easily over fifty years old.  Life has not been kind to her.

“Does she even have any teeth?”

“Fuck yeah she’s got teeth.”

She wanders out of sight.  He gets more desperate.

“Come on man just give me a dollar.  Do me a mercy.  I ain’t had my dick sucked in a long time.”

“I’m not giving you a dollar for a blowjob.  I saw her, you don’t want any of that.  I’m doing you a favor.”

He turns to my coworkers and asks them for a mercy, for a dollar.  Not happening.  He then runs over to a group of sixteen year old girls trying to buy tickets to a baseball game from a scalper.

I don’t hear what he says, but their eyes pop open wide.  The scalper has a disgusted look on his face and ushers the girls away from the desperate man.  The beggar has a huge grin on his face and crosses the street asking everyone for a dollar before vanishing out of sight.

FOUR HOURS LATER:

The same guy comes back.

“Hey man, give me a dollar so I can get a beer.”

“A beer huh?  Earlier it was a blowjob.”

“Yeah, and that didn’t work out so well, because you wouldn’t give me a fucking dollar!”

He storms off angry.

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